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    November 15, 2007

    Being homo in a hetero world

    Posted by: Chris

    Fdyq101x_2 It's always amusing when societal rules built around the idea that everyone is heterosexual have unintended consequences to the benefit of us homos. In a post earlier today I mentioned one: same-sex locker rooms that assume the sexes should be kept separate to preserve sexual privacy.

    Another example is highlighted by an article in the University of Miami's student newspaper, which reports that hetero students are up in arms that the school's gender-based dormitory policy means gay couples can live together but opposite-sex couples cannot:

    "We assign housing based on sex, not sexual preference," said Gilbert Arias, assistant vice president of Student Affairs. "There is no way we would know that a gay couple has moved in together."

    Though the University of Miami does not ask about sexual preference on the roommate selection form, some heterosexual students feel discriminated against.

    Corey Hipps, a sophomore, said he is moving off campus with his girlfriend next year because of the university's policy. Hipps said it's not fair that some couples can live on campus and some can't -- especially because living on campus is more convenient.

    Cue the violins. Still, the obvious solution is to provide some single-sex dorms for those who prefer that environment and some mixed-gender dorms. Of course that would require the university stop trying to play parent to its adult students. Dr. Franklin Foote, who teaches human sexual behavior at U of M, told the paper that couples who co-habit prior to marriage are more likely to get a divorce. Never mind whether that statistical relationship is causal, or whether the university tries to enforce any other housing rules based on divorce statistics.

    The whole thing reminds me of the time a friend was hospitalized in Atlanta after a car accident. His homophobic sister showed up, ready to shoo his gay friends out of sight, only to be informed that hospital policy only allowed a guest of the same-sex to spend the night in his hospital room. That meant his boyfriend could stay, but she had to go.

    Given how often society's rules are stacked against us, it's hard to get too upset about a few regs that backfire.

    Hat tip: Gay South Florida



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    1. Andoni on Nov 15, 2007 12:31:58 PM:

      Hmm.... Does US immigration law have a provision for "personal caregiver" .... hopefully for same sex caregivers only. :)

    1. Sean on Nov 15, 2007 5:40:17 PM:

      If they allow mixed-gender dorms there will be rapes and beatings galore. No one will be able to get any work done. After a few months the dorm members will want out because they can't stand being near a group of people of a different gender and all the stuff that brings. The guys will dislike being envoloped in women's perfume and girl chat and the girls will dislike the noise and rude comments by the guys.

      Besides that, what will happen if the opposite-sex couple breaks up, will they have to leave the dorm? The dorm would be pure chaos.

    1. Lucrece on Nov 15, 2007 8:06:39 PM:

      That's a nice way f reducing people to caricature-like gender stereotypes, isn't it? Even more appalling is how you perceive men to be wanton sexual predators who can't control their impulses. Most rapes occur as a result of the objectification of women, where men are unwilling to recognize them as equal human beings with qualities that transcend that of a sex toy; co-ed dorms would help and foster the dismantling of the silly gender war, kept just for the purposes of perpetuating that childish want for "mystic mystery" that should shroud the other sex. Men are from Earth and so are women; people will have to learn to deal with it.

      As for the actual post: I don't see how the locker room situation is favorable to us. It would only apply if all or most of the individuals frequenting it were gay. During most of high school, I found the experience of having to go into a locker room with other men to be rather mind-wracking. To be surrounded by a bunch of homophobic, naked men making mock displays of homosexual predators and their rebuke only helped to police myself rigorously so as to not give away any hint of discomfort. Luckily, I managed to get out of P.E. classes in favor for advanced level academic courses.

      As for the heteros' complaints, I find it laughable how they claim favoritism for homosexuals. It doesn't surprise me, though, as I live in Miami; and, apart from the decreasingly gay-friendly South Beach area, the place is rather hostile to gays with its high proportions of Southern white, Hispanic, and black populations. My message to them is thus: When you fear every day you go out with your boyfriend/girlfriend for your well-being, being unable to hold hands with your loved one on most circumstances, and you start hearing the word "straight" used in a derogatory manner every 10 minutes, then you can bitch about unfairness.

      As for your anecdote, Chris, I imagine that for your friend and his boyfriend that was a Kodak moment. It would've been hilarious if they had videotaped her reaction and put it up. Yum, yum, sweet irony.

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